Reflection on Feedback: I took the feedback from my peers and tried to implement a few minor changes that I hope are noticeable in this second try at my elevator pitch. The most useful tip I received from my peers was that in the first pitch I looked a little too stiff and almost robotic in a sense. I tried to lighten myself up and be more human in this pitch.
What I changed, based off feedback: What I did was that I tried to seem less like a robot. I did this just by calming myself down and trying to pretend that I am just having a normal conversation with someone, instead of just oddly speaking to the camera. I felt way more confident speaking and I feel like it flowed just a little bit better and I look more natural while I am talking. In addition, I also added some of what was said during the pitch. I felt that describing a little more in-depth about how I was planning on raising money for the company was really important in order to guide the potential consumers/investors towards benefiting my company financially. Finally, I feel like I stuttered a little on my words in this go, but I feel like it was important to upload this take because it felt the most real to me, rather than talking extra slow and potentially boring the listener. I now have an idea on how I need to improve for the next go at my elevator pitch.
Jayson,
ReplyDeleteI think your approach of pretending to have a normal conversation with someone instead of speaking to the camera really worked in your favor! I liked how you caught my attention from the very beginning and consistently used hand gestures to keep your pitch engaging and interactive. The only suggestion I could give you is to practice your pitch a few times so your words are delivered more smoothly as well as the pacing. But other than that, nice job!
Jayson,
ReplyDeleteI like how you added more physical movements in this elevator pitch. I thought this was something I struggled with in my elevator pitch as well. I think the movements you added were very effective and helped to explain your product well. I also agree that the conversational tone was done well, and did not seem too casual. Great job!
Jayson,
ReplyDeleteOn your previous elevator pitch I think you did a great job, but the little fixes that you made I think really improved your pitch overall. Even though they were little things like body movements that you struggled with, the content and how you spoke was really good which is amazing and I know a lot of people struggle most with that.